Road Trip And Motel Hell

You can’t make this stuff up.

I hit the road about six days ago due to pressing family matters and I needed a place to stay for a good price. I headed to Hotwire.com for a Hot Rate deal.

The website offers a list of hotels near your destination but doesn’t tell you the name of the place until you’ve booked. The trade-off for the missing info is a great price.

Like Hotwire, I won’t disclose the name of the hotel I picked but it was in South Tacoma, Washington. Probably not the best neighborhood I thought, but why not give it a chance for forty-nine dollars a night?

I booked it for seven days. We left after one. Here are twelve reasons why:

  1. You’re in the lobby checking in and look out the window to see a junkie trying to do a drug deal with your son who stayed in the car.
  2. While you’re waiting in line, the conversation turns to a car prowling – by one of the hotel employees.
  3. You have to pay your deposit in cash and don’t plan on picking it up before seven a.m.
  4. The hotel is next to the freeway.
  5. Someone nearby decides to launch left-over fireworks mortars towards the hotel: really big ones.
  6. Someone has taken the parking spot in front of your door.
  7. There are signs of a past forced entry into your room.
  8. It’s three in the morning and the person who parked in your spot decides it’s a good time to listen to rap.
  9. You wake up at eight to the sound of the same rap music – and a dog barking – right outside your door. The mortars are still coming.
  10. You meet your hotel neighbor who is the source of the barking – her dogs that is – all three of them. She tells you the story of how she inherited one from the guy who died in the room next to yours and how that is somehow connected to the car prowling story you heard in the lobby the night before.
  11. You decide the hot rate isn’t hot enough to justify another twenty-four hours at The Economorgue and while you’re once again in line in the lobby to claim your cash deposit, you learn there’s been yet another car prowling; this time with the windows smashed and the tires slashed.
  12. Yes, there was at least one car on jacks in the parking lot.